I blame it on the movies. If it wasn't for "Father of the Bride" or "My Best Friend's Wedding" I wouldn't have it in my head that a newly wed couple are suppose to head off on their honeymoon right after the wedding. You know the scene:
All the guests gather at the front door of the reception near the end of the night. An uproar of applause, Have fun's, and We'll miss you's erupt among the crowd as the newly weds make their way out the door, luggage in tow. The beaming bride waves one finally goodbye before emerging into the white vintage car. Cue the fireworks as the car makes it way down the driveway...Picture perfect isn't it?
It is until the reality of the situation kicks in (Damn you, reality). While leaving for your honeymoon right after the wedding is romantic, it may not always be the most ideal option. At least is isn't for me and the Office Groom. We had both initially wanted to leave soon after the wedding (a couple of days to re-energize, check out our gifts, and say our good-bye's to out of town guests), but a few factors such as possible bad weather at our honeymoon destination and vacations days through work made it difficult.
So when O.G. suggested that we wait it out until December - 3 months after our wedding - to go on our honeymoon, you'd think that reasonable ol' me would be jump on the bandwagon, right?
Wrong.
Back to the whole blame-game on wedding movies. While I wasn't so keen on leaving right after the wedding, knowing that I'd be a zombie for the next two days after the wedding, the idea of waiting out 3 whole months until we could go on our honeymoon didn't sit well with me. Can you imagine if they did that in movies? Talk about an anti-climactic ending.
My reasons (or "Reasons that made sense to me at the time")1. We wouldn't be "newly weds" anymore.
2. It might just feel like "just another trip"
3. We're
suppose to leave right after wedding...right?
We had a sit down one night, and I got it all out of my system. That is, not before warning O.G. that my reasons may sound silly but they were worries nonetheless. And once I did, I realized that I had never applied the "suppose to" rule in anything I did, so why should it be any different for a honeymoon? He reassured me that our honeymoon would feel like a honeymoon, regardless of when it happened. And that after the wedding we could still go away for a couple of days out of the city, like the
Niagara wine region, just to get away and be with each other. I was sold.
This past weekend we got together with on of O.G.'s groomsmen and his wife, and it was such a relief when I found out that they had done something similar! They said it worked for them because they were able to take it easy after the wedding, plus they had something to look forward to in the coming months. I was reminded of other stories from brides who had commented that they were sad after coming back from a honeymoon that happened right after the wedding, because it felt "over." I definitely didn't want that feeling. They also brought up a good point about honeymoons. Back in the ol' days, a
honeymoon was a means for a newly wed couple to get away and *wink wink nudge nudge* consumate their relationship. And typically, this would be the first time that the couple were on their own and travelling together.
This was definitely not the case for me and O.G. and for many modern couples today. We've been together for almost five years (tomorrow!) and living together *sharing a bed* for almost 3 years. We've also been on a number of trips that have taken us anywhere from the Caribbean to Europe.
So, a decision has been made. We will enjoy every minute of the wedding planning, the actual day, the days after, and the days leading up to the honeymoon. And of course the honeymoon. And unlike the movies, that never show you what happens after the bride gets into the vintage car, the most important thing that we will enjoy is our new bond for the rest of our lives :)
